What's After Midnight?

It's actually very frightening when you're confronted with a situation you never thought you'd be in. I know this blog is dedicated strongly to smiling, but tonight I experienced something that not only scared me deeply, but touched me so much that I can't not post about it.
And it's not going to be pretty.

After a tiring, explosive day at school delivering hundreds of roses, serenading and entertaining in preparation for Valentine's Day, Lindy and I took a well-deserved break and enjoyed a delicious Thai dinner along with the rest of our school prefect body. (Oh, it was delicious. You must try Thai).

The dinner went later that we anticipated, and I was waiting at the bus stop with two friends (Sonya and Taseen), joking around. The streets were still well-lit, being a Friday night, and distant sounds of people laughing, and glasses clinking drifted over occasionally.

Then I noticed an old lady stumbling closer to us. She had on a baggy sweatshirt and was carrying a heavy load of shopping. She was also eyeing my colouful bouquet of roses and white teddy-bear enviously.
"Are you kids celebrating Valentines early?" she said.
"Oh, yes!" We smiled and I offered her a spare rose, just in the spirit of Valentines. "Would you like a flower?"
"Thank you very much."
And then she shocked us completely.

"Can I have the bear too?"
Well we looked at this other confusedly - did this woman actually just ask us to give her our Valentine's presents for free? That was a little strange.

But the really frightening thing was when she burst into loud, sobs and tears dribbled from her eyes.
"I'm so very lonely now, and there's no one who cares about me!" she cried, grabbing at me.
"It's just so hard! I can't take it anymore." Awkwardly, I put an arm on her shoulder, and somehow she ended up in my arms, crying uncontrollably on my shoulder.

I don't know if you've ever had a complete stranger crying on you, but it's... REALLY uncomfortable. You feel like you want to fling them off and run far, far away.
Yet at the same time, it was terrible that a person had become that fragile, and seeing them break down like that. And I was ashamed of myself for not being more understanding - who knew what hardships she had been through?

"Here, take this," Sonya said softly, pushing her teddy bear into the woman's arms.
The old woman clutched the bear tightly, and wiped her tears on its soft fur.
Well we tried to talk to her about how she felt, and how nothing in life can't be won over. That things might be bad, but trials builds character. And no matter how bad a storm is, there's always a sunny day after it.

She seemed to get more distressed, until at one point she began screaming, a shrill, agonised noise.
Everyone in near vicinity turned and stared at us, whispered and pointed. Then she quietened down.

"Can we be friends, please?" she asked eagerly at one point. "Please. I'm so lonely. Can we keep in contact?"
Taseen took down her number, and in the end she shuffled away, a lone woman bent under the load of her shopping bags. I felt absolutely terrible.
We will never know if we made any difference to her life - but I hope so. And I don't know what you'll think of this incident.
But I realised how ridiculously lucky I am to have friends and family, who will always stand by me, no matter what. And now, actually meeting a person who has given up and lost all hope, I am determined to fight.

No matter how many trials and hardships life throws at us, we have to realise there is always someone who has it worse. To completely give up and wallow in self-pity and misery is just weak, because I've discovered life is worth fighting for. All the best moments of my existence have made up for every hour of crap I've been through, a hundred thousand times over. And we don't know how things fit in the bigger picture, so how can we say things will never get better?

So from now on, I'm counting my blessings and keeping my hope bright.
And to everyone who has ever said: "There's nothing good at all about my life."

Or "I've been through so much, I can't take it anymore." - you can.

Don't ever, EVER forget that even after the deepest, darkest, most haunted night - dawn always comes.

Happiness Equals Bracket =)