Just The Way You Are

I made a comment to my friends once that earned me a large amount of dirty glances and glares recently. And this was a bomber - this was the comment that caused them to refuse to talk to me for a whole period. This comment earned me a lot of slaps.

What did I say to deserve such meanness? Just three little words, really.
"Guys," I moaned one day," I. Feel. Fat."
Immediately everyone near me backed away with horrified expressions. Janet and Lindy turned their backs on me with identical looks of disdain.

"You!?" they shouted together. "YOU feel fat??! I can't believe you just said that!"
"I am not talking to you." Janet said moodily, and I got the silent treatment for a long, long hour.
 *            *                  *                     *

To those who know me, their reaction is not entirely strange. Ever since year 7, I've always been on the malnourished side, ranging between bony to average. Even though I'd been gradually gaining, I definitely wasn't unhealthy or overweight.

But although I had a healthy weight well-matched with my ridiculously tall height, secretly deep down, I wanted to be skinnier.
One moment I'd be happy with myself, the next I would see an even slimmer, pretty girl floating on the street and I'd wonder:  If I lost just a few extra kilos, would I look like that?

It wasn't an obsession, or even a priority - but I was never completely happy with myself. At the back of my mind, I felt like I had to keep losing weight until I had a perfect body.

Thankfully, I have some of the most wonderful people in the world as friends, and they made me realise how blinded and shallow I was being. Because how you look may matter for a few seconds, but to the people who are worth knowing in your life, they won't care!

It's the ones that see your flaws and failings, know the absolute worst parts about you, but genuinely love you anyway that really matter. 

This post isn't just about girly things like weight-loss either! Most of the time, as humans, we aren't happy with what we have. We want to be better in school, better at sports, better at making friends - until we reach a place where we can relax and say we've achieved it all.

The sad truth is you will be never be 'good' enough - what are you trying to be 'good enough' for? No matter what, there will always be somebody better than you. Now, I'm not scared to admit my weight anymore (58kgs because I'm SURE you were all wondering), but even I once thought it wasn't thin enough. It's frightening because it shows the quest for the best is never-ending.

But not being 'good' enough is a blessing in disguise! I'm not saying you shouldn't aim high :) Whatever you do, putting your best effort forward is important - just so you have no regrets later! However, realise that you don't have to be good enough. You can even fail. You know why?

Because you are perfect, exactly the way you are now.
Why is there so much focus on how pretty or handsome we are, whether we get the same marks as jko, or if we make it to prefects? These things will eventually stop mattering.

A beautiful face won't last, but a beautiful soul on the other hand, stays with you forever.

I have decided that I'm not going to be a silly girl who wishes for skinnier thighs and a prettier face. Who constantly wishes they had better maths marks and nothing less than a 99.5 ATAR! Instead, I want to learn to be a person who attracts others to them, simply through the selflessness, kindness and care they give. Somebody who is completely, utterly, gloriously happy with that they have!
How about you?

See, there's a reason why that Bruno Mars song is so darn popular!

It has a message I send to you with love today  - that you are amazing, just the way you are.

Always remember, Happiness Equals Bracket =)